Dear Vee,
I’m in a tough spot and need some advice from you all. Here’s the situation: the day my father passed away, a friend from the gym, who I don’t really know well—just someone I exchange occasional greetings with—added me to a group chat about a wedding. We don’t hang out, don’t know each other’s homes, and aren’t close friends, so I can’t really say we have a real friendship.
The wedding is happening this month, but my dad’s burial is scheduled for next month. In my culture, it’s customary to avoid attending events or celebrations until after a parent’s burial. The cost of the aso ebi (traditional wedding attire) is 40k, and I’ll need to spend over 10k just to travel to the wedding.
I’m torn about what to do. Should I let her know that I’m mourning my father and won’t be able to attend? Should I pretend everything is normal and just ignore the situation? Or should I attend the wedding without buying the aso ebi? I don’t even have the money for the aso ebi or to send her anything because all my funds are going towards my father’s burial arrangements.
This is really weighing on me and keeping me up at night. I’m not sure if she saw my post about my dad’s passing, as I shared it on my status. Since she hasn’t mentioned anything, it seems she might not know. What should I do right now? I need urgent advice because this is causing me a lot of stress.
