Dear Vee,
I’m dating this guy who lives with his older brother in a one-bedroom apartment. Both of them are single, and they make it work somehow. I, on the other hand, live alone in my own cozy apartment, but it’s not in the same area as theirs.
Now, here’s where things get tricky. My boyfriend keeps asking me to spend a weekend with him at his place. He really wants me to come over, and he’s been pretty insistent about it. But honestly, I’m not comfortable with the idea. Even though his brother’s girlfriend often stays there for up to two weeks at a time, I just can’t bring myself to do it. I can’t help but wonder how she manages it. Why can’t I get over this feeling?
It’s not like I haven’t been to his place before. I visit him often, staying from morning till evening, or sometimes I drop by after work and leave when it starts getting dark. But I’ve never spent the night there, and the thought of it makes me uneasy. I’m torn. Should I just give it a try and spend one weekend with him? Or should I keep telling him that I’m not comfortable with it?
I picture myself with a weekend bag in hand, standing at the door of their small apartment. His brother might be lounging on the couch, giving me a nod. The idea of sharing such a small space, figuring out bathroom schedules, and maneuvering around each other fills me with anxiety.
What if his brother decides to have friends over for a game night? Or what if there’s a surprise visit from family? Their small apartment, which is usually a cozy nest for my boyfriend and his brother, could quickly become a crowded, busy place, with me stuck in the middle, trying to find some peace.
But then, there’s the romantic side of it. I imagine lazy mornings together, cooking breakfast, and having those deep, late-night talks that seem to only happen when you’re sharing a space. The thought tugs at my heart, making my conflict even stronger.
As I weigh my options, I think about the times we’ve shared so far. The laughter, the connection, the love. Maybe this is just the next step for us, a hurdle to overcome together. But what if it’s not? What if my discomfort is a sign of something deeper, a feeling I shouldn’t ignore?
Vee, what do you think I should do?
